Your life feels grey and heavy — getting up is hard, social contact is hard, eating feels meaningless… You lack the energy for everything. Even when you can still see what is beautiful, it no longer reaches you emotionally. And you can’t quite say where all of this comes from.

Does it feel as though you’ve lost access to yourself, to others, and to the world? Without hope that life will become brighter again?

IFS therapy (Internal Family Systems) approaches depression by turning inward — in a deeply respectful and relieving way. Depression is not something to be fought. Instead, we seek to understand which part is so sad, which part needs to withdraw so deeply and turn away from the world.

You are not your depression.
You have a part of you that is depressed.

Negative thoughts spiral or circle around the same themes again and again. Anxiety is not a feeling — it is a state triggered by negative thoughts. Unfortunately, it cannot simply be switched off, even though anxiety always relates to the past or the future. Rarely does what we fear actually take place in the here and now.

Physical symptoms of anxiety are tension: a racing heart, tightness, restlessness, shallow breathing, trembling legs — we refer to this as alarm. An important question is: what comes first — anxious thoughts in the mind or the alarm in the body? In therapy, it is helpful to look at these two phenomena separately.

IFS therapy places the protective part of anxiety at the beginning of the process. What did this part once need to protect you from? Can you thank it for that? Could it slowly stop protecting you so much and begin to trust you more? This would allow you to make new experiences in the here and now.

What would you do if you no longer felt afraid?

For high-functioning people with a strong inner critic, it often feels as though there is no alternative but to keep performing — even when it has long stopped feeling good. Breaks no longer bring relaxation, because the body continues to “race.” How did it come to this? And what do you need in order to reconnect with your feelings — to enter a state that allows for a balance between tension and relaxation?

We work with the performance-driven part within you, which likely learned early on how good admiration, praise, and a sense of significance feel — perhaps love and affection in your life have so far never been “free of charge.” When you are no longer driven, inner freedom can emerge, allowing you to become independent.

How would you relate to others if you felt internally free?

Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) can develop when people have experienced extremely distressing or overwhelming events. These experiences do not only affect memory; they penetrate deeply into the autonomic nervous system. The body learns to remain in a state of constant alertness — even when there is objectively no longer any danger.

In complex PTSD, often resulting from developmental trauma, this imprinting occurs very early in life and can have a lasting impact on the autonomic nervous system. When safety, reliable attachment, or emotional attunement were lacking, the nervous system adapts in order to ensure survival. Tension, control, and performance become familiar states, while rest or closeness may feel unfamiliar or even threatening.

Many affected individuals appear highly functional on the outside. They perform well, are responsible, and resilient. Internally, however, they remain in a state of constant activation — driven by a strong inner critic, with little access to rest or embodied self-awareness. Breaks bring no relief, because the nervous system is unable to shift into a state of safety and regulation.

Trauma-sensitive support focuses on honoring these early adaptations and allowing the nervous system to have new experiences of safety. As internal pressure eases and regulation becomes possible again, a sense of connection, self-efficacy, and inner freedom can gradually emerge — along with a balance between tension and relaxation.